TONIGHT THERE’S REJOICING ON PLANET EARTH! “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” Praise the Lord, Hallelujah, Amen! RUSSELL BIT THE DUST! The Grand Master of Karma must have laughed out loud to watch sweet Matt’s dominos fall. Didn’t mighty mouse Russell just give us all a “Beetles come to America Girl” kinda’ performance….weep openly, clutch cheeks, and cover eyes. PLEEEEEAAASSSSEEE! Gag a maggot, Russell! “You’re the professional Quarterback playing with the pee wee league”. You’re killin’ us, Russell! To finish first, you must first finish! Ho Hum!
Yes Siree! Another blood curdling duel with dominos! But Thank Matt’s lucky stars and calm composure that the winds favored him over Russell. We’re all glad to know that this is Russell’s last time to play Survivor! Suck it up, Russell. Your Tribe “Threw the challenge just to get rid of you!” You’d think that even Russell could grok that the next step after being all puffed up with way over-rated arrogance would be falling flat on his face in front of millions of people. GAME OVER, RUSSELL! Our “rookie” is still in the game! Go on back to Loser’s Camp, Russell, and live inside the four grim walls of your failure.
To say that Phillip is a “Piece of Work” is the most understated truth of the century. He’s simply UNBELIEVEABLE! Rob’s description of Phillip’s “stuff hangin’ out”……disturbing and disgusting….you wouldn’t want your friends comin’ out to see that!” I’ll bet the Secret Service unit of the United States Government is peering out from under rocks about now. What an embarrassment to our military forces!
Boston (Now Florida) Rob is a smooth wave, making up rewards and games to move his Tribe outta’ camp. Ralph couldn’t keep his mouth shut about the idol, but we can swear on Russell’s grave that Rob won’t tell about his idol find. “With the idol, Rob just might make it all 39 days”.
The only surprise about Kristina heading out is that it wasn’t Phillip! Kristina started out on the wrong side of the numbers and that’s a place from which there is no redemption. She definitely got “rear ended and raked across the coals.” I’m counting on it happening again on Redemption Island.
Droopy Drawers might stick around another few days, but his days are numbered. The malice toward Phillip is palpable! We can feel it right here in our living rooms! Phillip is “disruptive”, delusional, and a loose cannon”. He’s just got to go! I don’t think even his “Shepherd Stamp” can save his butt now. He is fast using up his tenure on our island. He’s simply full of cockamamie, humdinger, BS!
Ralph can’t spell and he seems to have the IQ of a soap dish, but he’s one tuff competitor. Boston Rob is a contractor and builder and Hairy Ralph “out sawed, out hammered, and out chopped” everyone to lead his team to a blazing victory. Rooster Ralph is winning over America.
Julie showed her buff self off in the challenge and won some affection from her tribe. Mike hasn’t thought about sex in two weeks, and Grant is still about the best looking hunk to play this game in 21 seasons.
Speaking of seasons, CBS just signed on two more seasons of Survivor in which Jeff will be both host and Executive Director. Was that an Amen and Hip Hip Hooray?